Odd Days: When I get old, buy me a motorcycle

Some people laugh when an old fart goes out and buys a Harley. Or when they see an old fartess riding a bicycle down the street. Well, you won't catch me laughing. I have every intention of being one of those fartesses...when I get old.

So I thought of this because my father asked me to buy him a mobile phone for Hanukkah. Although I've always thought of my dad as an adventurer, he never managed to jump securely onto the technology bandwagon. He takes flying leaps, clings by his fingertips for a short time, then lets go and falls haplessly back into old habits. (This is in marked contrast to my mother who owns and uses every new gadget invented over the last three decades.) I know this about my father because Durf gave him a mobile phone some years ago. We have no idea where that phone is, but I can assure you that my father never put his fingers on the keys. Moreover, he has been using a *corded* phone his entire life.

He might be 85, but things are about to change:





And that's the way it's going to be for me, too. I have adventures scheduled out for the next 20 years or so. But the time will come when I'll undoubtedly retire my bicycle. At that time my nieces and nephews will probably be looking around for something to keep me engaged with the world. I'm putting them on notice. Buy me a Harley!