Odd Days: Lunatics Part II

As Durf & I have mentioned before, Colorado laws and Colorado drivers (for the most part) are quite bike and runner friendly. This is in contrast to states like Florida where the generally accepted practice is for drivers to run bikes off the road. If they happen to hit the bike in the process, all the better. If they miss, well, they hope to scare the rider to death.

In truth, though, there are lunatics in every state. And the behavior is much the same. A lunatic in a car likes to come up behind a bike and blast the horn. That causes the bike to swerve wildly. The car zooms by, well within arm's reach of the bike. Sometimes the driver leans out the window and hollers, or offers up a finger.

If the target of the lunatic is a runner, who would be running facing traffic of course, the car comes toward the runner, moving across the white line and onto the shoulder to make sure he is in the runner's path.

I'm not making this up. These things happen to me several times a year. After my heart rate returns to normal, I usual ponder the lunatic's motivation. Is he jealous because he isn't a studly runner/biker? Does he feel that runners/bikers have no business on the road -- even in the dirt off the shoulder? Does it just make him mad that people want to exercise? Does he feel that the world would be a better place if people drove everywhere and then sat on a couch for recreation?

You gotta think there's some humanity deep inside these people and if you could just get the burr out of their butts, they would lighten up.

Well good news. We've found the prescription: A tandem. Everybody loves a tandem. They wave, they smile, and they shout as they pass. But they don't shout vile epithets, they shout "Tandem!" -- not realizing that his name is actually Dracula.